Hi there! I hope everyone in the US had an amazing Thanksgiving, and now we have some giveaway winners to make the holiday season even more special.
Congratulations to those who won on this website:
DarcyBennet and EvaE
And Congratulations to the three who won from the Austen Variations giveaway:
Bambi, Mary Gerlach, and Paige Hale
Congratulations again and Happy Listening!
I thought I’d post a bit of a throwback today. If you’ve been following my upcoming release, His Perfect Gift, you may wonder where my original idea came from. This is the original scene, written for Pride and Prejudice: Behind the Scenes that I souped up and continued for His Perfect Gift. In the meantime, if you haven’t preordered His Perfect Gift, you can do so here! Release is the 21st and coming quick!
26 January 1812.
An hour prior, Colonel Fitzwilliam had appeared in his study, insisting they had to venture out to a shop in Cheapside. Cheapside! Of course, he had refused, if for no other reason, but to avoid yet another reminder of Elizabeth Bennet. Was there nothing that would spare him the torment of her memory? Unfortunately, his cousin would not leave him to the solitude of his library.
“I must insist you finally tell me where we are going,” he demanded in a surly tone.
Fitzwilliam lifted his eyebrows. “My but you are ill-tempered this morning. What has you in such a mood these days?”
“You are aware how much I dislike the balls and dinner parties of the season? I have had to endure your mother’s Twelfth Night ball as well as a dinner party given by none other than Miss Bingley. I should think those two events alone would be enough to sour anyone’s disposition.” Darcy steered his attention to the view outside the window as he attempted to avoid any further discourse on the subject.
A hearty chuckle came from across the carriage. “The only teeth set on edge by Miss Bingley belong to you, cousin, and I daresay it is your own fault.”
His head jerked back. “My fault?”
“You are too concerned with offending Bingley, so you do not treat her in the curt manner you do most women.”
Aggravation with his cousin’s observation and the situation welled within him. “I may not enjoy speaking with the ladies as you do, but I am not curt.”
The colonel gave a small snort. “I beg to differ. I have seen many a lady who was offended by your method of keeping them at bay.”
“I have no wish to be ensnared by any of them, so I ensure I do nothing to encourage their hopes.” With a heavy exhale, Darcy grimaced. “But I am afraid my latest endeavour to be of aid to Bingley has not helped the matter with Miss Bingley.”
His cousin’s expression reflected his curiosity as he leaned forward in his seat. “So, you have saved Bingley from himself once again? What was it this time? Another bad investment opportunity?”
Darcy shook his head. “Bingley became enamoured of a local girl while in Hertfordshire.”
“That does not sound too dire,” responded the colonel. “He is always fancying himself in love; it passes soon enough.”
Again, he shook his head. “No, this time was different. Bingley showed a decided preference for the young lady from the first of their acquaintance, and by the time of the ball at Netherfield, it became apparent that he had raised the expectations of the neighbourhood. They all believed him soon to propose.”
His cousin furrowed his brows. “You felt a marriage to this lady to be imprudent?”
Darcy closed his eyes as he envisioned the deplorable behaviour of Mrs Bennet and the three youngest Bennet daughters. “It would have been a most imprudent match. She had little dowry, no connections, and the behaviour of her family was objectionable, to say the least.”
“You must consider it a triumph to have successfully separated the two.”
“You can be certain,” he stated with conviction. “My only regret is that by being in collusion with Miss Bingley, she seems more assured I will one day propose to her. She is intolerable.
Colonel Fitzwilliam regarded Darcy with a critical eye, prompting him to shift in his seat. “Come to think of it, your insufferable mood was not present until your return with Bingley.” A smirk lit his cousin’s face. “Did you make the acquaintance of a woman in Hertfordshire? Would you be pining for someone as unsuitable as Bingley’s new angel?”
He scoffed as he adjusted his cuffs. Elizabeth Bennet? Unsuitable? If not for her family and connections, she would be eminently suitable. “You are ridiculous. I would never be so imprudent.”
The colonel sighed. “No, I suppose you would not.”
“What is so special about this wine and brandy merchant?” asked Darcy, with the intention of changing the subject.
“As I told you earlier, he boasts of a particularly fine assortment of port, claret, and brandy. My father was impressed by their selection when he placed his order for the ball. I thought you might wish to meet the proprietor.”
He suppressed a smile at the success of his manoeuver. “I do not see the urgency of such a matter. I have a perfectly adequate supplier on Piccadilly Street, who I have used since my father passed.”
With an irritated huff, his cousin sat back against the squabs. “I would wager this man’s prices to be more reasonable. He will also deliver to Grosvenor Square and Belgravia, which means you should not have to return once you have set up an account.”
The two gentlemen stared at one another for a few seconds until Colonel Fitzwilliam shook his head and turned to watch the buildings pass through the window.
A row of houses along Gracechurch Street drew Darcy’s particular interest while he avoided further conversation with his cousin. Did one of them belong to the uncle of Elizabeth Bennet? He had never taken the time to study the neighbourhood in the past, and he had to admit some of these homes were actually pleasant and well tended. Of course, the appearances did not necessarily correspond to the personalities of the owners. After all, Longbourn was not objectionable from all outward appearances.
A small park ahead caught his eye. Had Miss Elizabeth ever walked in that park? With her love for the activity, she must have during one of her visits to her family. He could almost envision her strolling through the trees, her hair windswept and the hem of her dress stained with grass and dirt—much as she had appeared upon her arrival at Netherfield to care for her sister.
They drew closer, and a young lady at the front gates came into focus, revealing her to be none other than Jane Bennet. Darcy leaned back from the window, while he watched her walk into the park hand in hand with a small child, a servant trailing behind.
He would have to ensure Bingley remained away from Cheapside for the near future. They had struggled so to prevent his return to Hertfordshire and to conceal Miss Bennet’s presence in London; it would not do for him to happen upon her now.
“There is a handsome young lady,” said his cousin, interrupting his thoughts. “Who is she?”
With a shrug of his shoulders, Darcy donned a mask of feigned indifference. “How am I to know? I would imagine a tradesman’s daughter, one of good means by her dress.”
“You appeared to have recognised her, or at least, taken interest?”
“No, I am not acquainted with her, and as for her being of interest…” His last view as they passed was of Jane Bennet smiling to the child at her side. “She smiles too much.”
Colonel Fitzwilliam gave a bark of laughter. “That has to be the most preposterous notion I have ever heard you utter. What man has not been bewitched by the smile of a beautiful woman?”
Miss Elizabeth again came to mind and Darcy gave a wry grin. “Perhaps a pair of fine eyes might one day garner my notice.”
His cousin chuckled. “I pity you when they do. You are so accustomed to maintaining your distance, you will be at a loss as to how to win her favour.” He turned serious and held Darcy’s eye. “But she will be a lucky woman—a lucky woman indeed.”
I’ve mentioned this is coming, and due to popular demand, Rain and Retribution is on audiobook! I’m so excited and I hope everyone gets a chance to hear Alexandra Lee Smith’s brilliant narration, so until you are able to listen to your copy, I have a sample for you!
It’s one of my favorite scenes and the first I ever imagined, so when I started writing, I had to figure out how to get E and D on that road together. It was so much fun listening to Alexandra bring Darcy’s disbelief to life and I hope you enjoyed it as well.
To get your own copy click on the link to Audible US, Audible UK, Audible France, or Audible Germany
In the meantime, I’m giving away 5 copies of Alexandra’s fun great narration. Just leave me a comment below and let me know whether you’re Audible US or Audible UK so I know what kind of code to send you when the time comes 🙂
Happy listening!
Today, I have an excerpt from my first book, Rain and Retribution. I have been asked over the years to have an audiobook produced for this story, so I’m chuffed to bits to tell you I’ve found a narrator! Alexandra Lee Smith has accepted my offer and seems excited to get going. Due to the length of the book, the release will not be for a couple of months, but there will be a release!
Now, to get to that excerpt!
Elizabeth could hear the hustle and bustle of the people in Meryton, and was relieved when the noise of the town died away, leaving only the sound of the creaking cart. Mr. Hill let her know that she could come out from under the cover since the road was clear; however, it was not long after when it began to rain.
Unfortunately, Elizabeth did not have any protection from the weather, and the cover over the cart did not offer any barrier from the wet and the cold. As a result, she quickly became completely soaked through and began to shiver due to the chill of the late November storm. The rain increased in intensity and the road quickly became muddy. Without warning the wagon pitched to one side, causing her to be thrown off balance into the side of the cart.
“Blast!” swore Mr. Hill. “Oh! I apologize, Miss Lizzy!” he exclaimed, as he suddenly remembered Elizabeth’s presence.
She jumped down, splashing mud all over her dress and petticoats. Her situation was not good—it was not good at all! Hatfield was miles away, the rain showed no signs of stopping, and she was cold and filthy. Mr. Hill quickly ascertained that the cart had fallen into a deep rut made impossible to see with the water pooling in the road. Not only was the wheel stuck, but it was also broken.
They were not too far out of Meryton, and Mr. Hill decided to walk back in order to find shelter and someone to help, but he refused to leave her there in the weather. Elizabeth began to panic; she certainly could not return to Meryton. She argued that she would find a spot under a tree to wait out the storm; yet, he would not be moved. She was finally forced to acquiesce, and was waiting for Mr. Hill to unhitch the horse for the walk back when a carriage appeared through the sheets of rain. Elizabeth could not identify the equipage, but vehemently prayed it was not someone who would return her to Longbourn.
~ * ~
Darcy had been staring out at the rain, trying not to contemplate the fine eyes of Elizabeth Bennet, when he noticed a cart to the side of the road that seemed to be having difficulty. As they moved closer to the broken down cart, he thought he saw Elizabeth standing a short distance away from the wreck. He shook his head as if to clear it.
“Good Lord, now I am seeing her everywhere!” he exclaimed, not believing his eyes.
Normally, Darcy would have stopped to help, but Meryton, the last place he wished to be, was still the closest town, so he decided to keep moving. Yet, as they began to pass, he could not help but take a closer look at the young woman standing next to the road. She had a petite frame with a light and pleasing figure, which could only remind him of Elizabeth. However, he could not make out her face, and found himself mesmerized as he watched her peel the soaked bonnet off of her drenched chestnut curls. He was willing to swear that it was Elizabeth Bennet.
“Blast!” he cursed as he beat his walking stick against the roof of the carriage. He had to be sure. If indeed it was her, his conscience would not allow him to simply leave her out in the dreadful weather.
The carriage had barely skidded to a halt when Darcy burst forth before the groom could open the door, striding to the young woman who looked up and startled him to a stop. He could not believe his eyes; he was dumbfounded. Elizabeth Bennet was truly standing before him, sopping wet, her dark curls plastered to her face, her piercing emerald green eyes betraying her shock at his arrival. He took a few hesitant steps to stand in front of her.
“Miss Bennet,” he said as he noticed that her clothes were wet through and she was shivering from the cold.
“Mr. Darcy,” she replied. She was trying very hard not to be intimidated by his six-foot plus frame, which seemed to tower over her, his vivid blue eyes visible even through the heavy rain.
“I was passing and noticed that you were stranded. May I be of assistance?”
Elizabeth could not believe he had stopped, much less offered his aid. “Mr. Hill was conveying me to the post station in Hatfield when the cart became stuck and the wheel broke. We were just preparing to walk back to Meryton when you happened upon us.”
“Please allow me to be of assistance. You are cold and need to get out of the rain. We can take shelter in my carriage while we discuss your options?”
“Mr. Darcy, you are perfectly aware that it would not be proper for me wait in your carriage with you,” she objected. Although she desperately wanted to be out of the weather, she knew that Mr. Darcy had only ever looked at her to find fault. Jumping into his carriage at the offer he surely felt obligated to make, especially as wet as she was, would most certainly not improve his opinion of her.
“You will catch your death in this rain,” Darcy implored, becoming concerned at her increasing pallor and shivers. “I promise you will be perfectly safe with me—unless you think your servant will gossip, because I assure you, mine will not.”
His statement affronted Elizabeth and she became defensive. “No, Mr. Hill will not say a word, but I am soaked through, and I really do not believe that you want me in your carriage.”
“I would not make the offer, if I did not mean for you to accept.”
Elizabeth still had reservations, but she nodded. “Thank you.” She turned to remove her valise from its hiding place within the cart and startled when Mr. Darcy took it from her, immediately passing it to a servant before he hurried to assist Elizabeth into the carriage. Once inside, he pulled some rugs from under the seat.
“If you remove your pelisse, you can dry off as much as possible and warm yourself with these.”
She nodded just before he turned his back to her, so she could remove the drenched garment without exposing her wet form to him. When she had dried as much as she could with one of the smaller rugs, she wrapped herself in the two largest and turned to face him. She noticed that while he had become wet, he was not as soaked as she was. He had not been in the rain for long in addition to being protected by his greatcoat, which he had since removed.
Elizabeth was not sure why Mr. Darcy was being so kind to her; he had always been so proud and aloof. After all, he had insulted her at the Meryton Assembly. He practically oozed disdain whenever he was in company with her family, so why would his manner change so drastically?
Upon indicating that she was covered, he turned and regarded her curiously. She was so cold and wet that he did not expect her to refuse his offer, and now she seemed so cautious. Was she afraid of him? Did she think he would become angry if she soaked the upholstery?
“If you tell me where you are going, I can transport you there, so you do not have to venture back into this horrid weather.”
“I am traveling to my uncle’s house in Cheapside,” she said, waiting to see a reaction to her destination. “Mr. Hill had to run an errand in Hatfield and was delivering me to the post station, so I could take the next post to London. The rain stalled us.”
Darcy pondered his dilemma. He could not strand Miss Bennet here, and he did not feel it was prudent to leave her at the post station alone. However, could he ride in a carriage—alone with her—and not lose his head? He was worried about being in such close proximity to her for the trip to London, yet there did not seem to be much choice in the matter.
“I am en route to London now and would be pleased to escort you.”
“Sir, I appreciate your offer, but it would be an imposition. I am perfectly able to travel by post,” Elizabeth answered, wondering what he was about.
“I insist. It is no imposition,” declared Darcy. “I have the room, and I am already traveling for London. If you are worried about your reputation, you have assured me of your servant’s discretion, and I assure you that mine will not breathe a word—no one need ever know.”
Elizabeth eyed him warily. She was not sure about travelling all of the way to London, but she was not going to mention that now, since it would only cause further debate. She was resolved to ride with him no further than Hatfield where she would remain behind at the post station when he departed. Elizabeth nodded her agreement causing Darcy to confer with his driver. Mr. Hill was not happy leaving her with the gentleman, insisting on and receiving confirmation of her choice before he left with the horse to return to Meryton.
As the carriage began to move again, Darcy looked at Elizabeth not understanding her trepidation. Deciding conversation was the best way to put her at ease, he tried to think of topics to discuss, and remembering her words from the Netherfield ball, gave a small smile.
“Miss Bennet, we must have some conversation.”
She raised her right eyebrow in response to his statement, recognizing her words from the previous night. He was such an enigma; maybe the ride would give her the opportunity to finally sketch his character.
“What do you wish to discuss, Mr. Darcy?”
“I wish to ask you about a comment you made last night, if you would allow me.”
“Of course.”
“You claimed Mr. Wickham had been so unlucky as to lose my friendship, in a manner which he would suffer from all his life. I was wondering precisely what he told you.”
Elizabeth took a deep breath. “Mr. Wickham informed me of his relationship to your family. He told me of your father’s wishes, as well as your refusal of the living your father had meant for him.”
Darcy was angry to find he was correct in his earlier assumptions. “I suppose he left out the portion of the story in which he informed me that he was resolved not to take orders and was compensated accordingly,” he declared, without thinking or regarding the tone of his voice; her face flushed and her eyes widened in surprise.
He paused for a moment to gather his thoughts, beginning again in a more regulated tone of voice. “Wickham was the son of my late father’s steward. Mr. Wickham senior was a respectable man, and to reward a faithful servant, my father supported the younger Wickham at school and later at Cambridge.”
Darcy returned his gaze to Elizabeth’s eyes. “When my father died, Wickham turned down the living. He claimed a desire to study the law, so I provided him with three thousand pounds in lieu of the living as well as the one thousand pounds my father bequeathed to him in his will.
However, when the living at Kympton became available, he reappeared, requesting a letter of presentation. Obviously, I refused.”
At this point, overwhelmed by what she was hearing, Elizabeth noticed Mr. Darcy take a deep shuddering breath as he returned to looking at the rain, appearing pained, almost defeated. She watched in amazement when, as he turned to face her, his entire manner and demeanour changed. The whole of his body had become rigid, and his face had the stern expression she was so used to seeing him wear.
“The circumstances of my next meeting with Wickham I would wish to forget, and I sincerely ask you to keep this matter between us, as it could have rather dire consequences should this information come to the attention of society.”
Elizabeth was not sure what to make of his request, yet she nodded her head in acquiescence.
“Last summer, my sister and her companion, a Mrs. Younge, travelled to Ramsgate. Wickham followed, persuading Georgiana to believe herself in love and consent to an elopement.”
Darcy took a deep breath. “Fortunately, I joined them unexpectedly a day or two before the intended elopement, and my sister, confessed the entirety of the affair. His primary object was my sister’s fortune of thirty thousand pounds. I also believe he intended to revenge himself on me.”
Mr. Darcy’s gaze returned out of the window as he said in a softer tone, “His revenge would have been complete indeed.”
At the end of his recitation, Elizabeth looked at Mr. Darcy in shock. Oh, how could she have believed George Wickham! She had never questioned how inappropriate it was for him to impart his history with Mr. Darcy so soon after making her acquaintance, and realised with mortification that as a result of his unfortunate comment at the Meryton assembly, she had allowed her prejudice against him to influence every interaction between the two of them.
Elizabeth contemplated the change in his manner prior to relating the tale of his sister; she watched him don a mask that had slowly slipped, revealing the pain of the memory in his eyes. Had he been hiding his true self whenever in company? Why would a man of sense and education hide himself from the world?
“I regret that I attempted to provoke you last night with my uncivil behaviour. I am ashamed to admit that I believed his slander and I whole-heartedly apologize,” declared Elizabeth, fighting back tears of embarrassment.
“Please, do not make yourself uneasy, Wickham’s easy manners deceive many people. I have not only witnessed but also dealt with the repercussions of his deceptions too many times to count.”
Darcy had hoped to warn Elizabeth to be on her guard with Wickham. He had not realised that her generous heart would be hurt by discovering the cad’s true character, and found his stomach in knots as he became aware that he was jealous Wickham had gained her regard.
“Now, I only wish I had imparted this information earlier, in order to prevent injury to you,” he said sympathetically.
Elizabeth had her brow furrowed in thought until she understood his implication. “Sir, you misunderstand. He had pleasing manners and I enjoyed his company, but he did not injure me.”
“Good, I am relieved to hear it,” he replied, exhaling in relief. His jealousy and worry subsided as her confession settled within his mind and heart.
Now that he had revealed his history with Wickham, Darcy began to think about how odd it was to discover her on the side of the road, in the pouring rain no less. Why did she not take the post coach from Meryton? Why was she traveling to London with only a valise and not a trunk? He was beginning to think there was more to her story than a trip to visit her aunt and uncle.
“May I ask you another question?” Darcy queried.
“By all means,” said Elizabeth, wondering what was causing the suddenly contemplative look, which had appeared on his face.
“I apologize if you find me intrusive, but I was wondering why you did not take the post from Meryton.”
Elizabeth, who did not expect the question, coloured and looked away, not knowing how to answer without revealing all.
“I have entrusted you with some very personal information. I assure you, I can be trusted with your deepest and darkest secrets as well,” he continued with a mischievous smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
Elizabeth’s eyes widened as she looked at his expression; it was so very different from the usual stern manner he used in company. She had never considered him unattractive, however seeing the beginnings of a smile on his face, she realised how very handsome he was.
“I do not doubt your discretion. My story is rather embarrassing, and I fear you will not think very highly of me when it is concluded,” Elizabeth answered, turning to look out of the carriage window. “I would prefer to leave matters as they are. You can deliver me to the post station in Hatfield without any knowledge of my future plans, other than that I was traveling to Cheapside.”
Darcy began to worry with her last statement. “I doubt you have heard, but Mr. Bingley and his sisters departed Netherfield today. Obviously, I am leaving as well, and while I do not know if Bingley plans to return to the neighbourhood, I do not.” She returned her gaze to him as he continued. “If you are leaving without your parents’ knowledge, I will not be in Meryton to be questioned, nor will I offer any information regarding your whereabouts, unless it is your wish.”
He had such an earnest look upon his face that she could not help but believe him, but did that mean she could divulge her plans and the reason behind them? She was concerned that taking Mr. Darcy into her confidence would only complicate matters immensely, and complications were not something she could afford at the moment.
“Miss Bennet, if you have chosen to leave home, you will have limited options available to you. I would be willing to assist you should you require it.”
“I could not ask that of you, sir,” replied Elizabeth softly. She was dumbfounded. Mr. Darcywanted to help her. It was inconceivable, yet he was offering. Why would he do that?
“Tell me why you are leaving and let me be the judge of whether or not I would like to help,” he implored.
Elizabeth was mortified. She closed her eyes, and attempted to order her thoughts. He had assured her of his discretion. After all, he expected her not to divulge the information he had imparted regarding his sister. She opened her eyes and adjusted the rugs around her body, still trying to warm herself as she decided that she did not have much choice but to trust Mr. Darcy.
Hi there, one and all! Tomorrow is the day Austen Variations holds its annual Summer Sale, and I’m offering a sneak peek of what I will have on sale from July 2-4. Make sure you stop by Austen Variations tomorrow because all of the links will be there waiting for you! The sale will feature books by Jennifer Altman, Jack Caldwell, Nicole Clarkston, Christina Morland, Joana Starnes, Marilyn Brant, Shannon Winslow, and of course me. So stop on by and check out all of the great deals!
In the meantime, here is what will be from me in the sale!
All Ellie ever dreamed of was the perfect vacation.
Ellie Barrett’s first glimpse of the island resort is everything she dreamed when she planned her long-awaited tropical getaway—sun, sand, and miles of brilliant aquamarine water. She’d made it! Two whole weeks to explore paradise. What could possibly be better?
Perhaps an athletic man in board shorts with a body to die for and a pair of stunning blue eyes? On her first evening, she meets William. Intelligent, amazing to talk to, and hot as sin, he’d never be interested in her, but it didn’t mean she couldn’t enjoy the view while it lasted!
But perfection isn’t bound to last. What if William isn’t everything he seems? When love persists over all obstacles, is it enough? How can Ellie trust William and protect her heart at the same time?
It’s Always Been You is a flirty, fun, and remarkably satisfying contemporary romance! I cannot wait to spend more time in Marysville, South Carolina with these characters! – Austenesque Reviews
Jena Barrett loves her perfect life. She has the best job in the world, a great place to live, and a best friend that she adores. The only hiccup is this wedding planner’s love life! However, when her sister Ellie suggests a remedy for Jena’s lack of significant other, the notion is so insane, it flips Jena’s universe off-kilter.
Brandon has always been the steady fixture in Jena’s life, her best friend. Even when he joined the Army out of high school, they never lost touch, picking up as though he never left the moment he returned. Now a local veterinarian, Brandon is the perfect man candy with his successful career, amazing personality, and a face and body no woman would kick out of bed—only he never dates. Not that she’s ever questioned why, at least not until now.
Could Ellie be right? Could he possibly be in love with her? If so, could Jena ever love him in the same way? The risk is huge. If everything blows up in her face, she could lose her best friend. But what if the train wreck doesn’t happen? What if Brandon is her missing piece, her happy ever after?
“It’s Always Been Us is another vibrant and engaging contemporary romance by L.L. Diamond – perfect for summer! Ms. Diamond has a wonderful talent for creating likable characters, capturing charming small-town vibes, and crafting together a captivating modern-day romance!” – Austenesque Reviews
If only he’d never come back!
Charlie didn’t mind being on her own. Heck, she’d been on her own since her high school sweetheart Jensen Worth left town for good after graduation. He obviously never looked back, so why should she? She had family and friends to keep her company. She certainly didn’t need a man in her life!
Thirteen years after Jensen left Marysville, he’s returned, joining the Marysville police force and reconnecting with the friends he left behind all those years ago—her friends. Why couldn’t he have simply stayed away? Her life was certainly much simpler without him around! The problem is he keeps turning up like a bad penny. Charlie not only has to bump into him around town, but to add insult to injury, her mother invites him for Thanksgiving. Can a little dog named Daphne, a family emergency, and pushy, meddling friends help break down that enormous wall around Charlie’s heart? Will Charlie be able to remain angry with the only man she’s ever loved, or God forbid, will she fall in love with him all over again?
“Charlie and Jensen are a couple you cannot help but love and wish to see succeed! This contemporary Austen-inspired romance series by L.L. Diamond is full of charm, couples with chemistry, and Jane Austen connections! I highly recommend!” – Austenesque Reviews!
Single mother Maggie Dashwood has no time for distractions. She’s just been promoted from an assistant to a full-fledged wedding planner, and her six-year-old daughter, Harper, keeps her running. So, why do her grandmother and her co-workers insist that she needs a man in her life? After all, a man would do nothing more than to split that precious little bit of free time she manages to snare between weddings and Harper. They might also leave like Harper’s father. Why would she want to risk that?
After an accident, her grandmother’s matchmaking eyes hone in on hunky Elliot Martin, an EMT who’s best friends with Maggie’s boss Charlie. As far as her grandmother is concerned, Elliot is flirty, sexy, and an all-around great guy whose singular purpose of wooing Maggie fits perfectly with her plan of finding love for her granddaughter. Meanwhile, Maggie struggles to maintain her equilibrium as well as dry palms when he’s around.
When ghosts from Maggie’s past return and threaten her possible happily ever after, will Elliot be the rock she so desperately needs or will he leave like Harper’s father before him?
“This series has been amazing! I have loved every single one! Romance, danger, pure love! Wish I could give more than 5 stars!! Read in under a day! Can’t wait to read all four again!!! ” – Amazon Review
Fascinated upon a first acquaintance, the Earl of Matlock is a determined suitor, but Rebecca Fairchild is not so certain. The earl is kind, yet he is always so frustrating and stubborn! He is not what she had planned or what she ever imagined in a partner. Other ladies have also laid claim to the handsome Lord Matlock despite his preferences. Can he convince Rebecca he is her future or will other forces stand in the way of their happily ever after?
“All the characters in this tale were well-defined, strong, and memorable. Whenever I put this book down, my head would remain full of them for long periods after.” – Austenesque Reviews
“I fell in love with the Earl when Rebecca did.” – Obsessed by Mr. Darcy
It’s been almost two weeks since Agony and Hope was released, and I’m still bowled over by the response. Nearly 600,000 page reads and 196 reviews (Undoing still has 197). That’s just amazing. Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed. I couldn’t have asked for a better response.
As for more amazing news, Stevie Zimmerman has completed the narration for Agony and Hope and it is submitted for approval! It’s just the ACX review team standing between that lovely recording and your ears. Hopefully, the process won’t take too long!
I have another Agony and Hope scene for you! This is another scene from before the rewrite. You can read the visit to Mrs. Bennet here and the theatre scene here. The theatre scene precedes this one and the epilogue that was in the published book is the scene after. I hope you’re ready for another wedding!
I have left the scene as is from the original draft, so this is completely unedited. Sorry for any errors!
Happy Reading!
Fitzwilliam straightened his cuffs, glancing at the clock to ensure he had arrived downstairs in time. While he and Elizabeth had a wedding to host today, the allure of his wife and their bed had proved impossible to resist, which was why he arrived with only three minutes to spare.
He rubbed his hands together and attempted to push the lingering memory of this morning from his mind, when instead of rising early and preparing for the busy day ahead, they lingered to make love and breakfast together in their sitting room. During the meal, the knowledge Elizabeth sat beside him in nothing but her dressing gown had done little to help him consider the day ahead, and rather brought to mind images of her fresh from sleep, dishevelled and writhing beneath him, her soft murmurings and noises driving him to bury himself inside her again and again. As soon as she finished her last bite, he dragged her back to bed where he loved her until they both could do naught but hold each other as they recovered.
He entered his study, determined to not take the steps two at a time to return to Elizabeth. No sooner had he stepped behind his desk, but a rap at the door drew him back to the hall where Butler allowed Richard entry. “Good morning, Lord Carlisle. I hope you are well.”
“Yes, exceedingly well, thank you.” Once his coat and hat were left with the servant, Richard took one look at Darcy and chuckled. “For goodness’ sakes, remove that ridiculous grin from your face. I do not even have to ask to know what has pleased you so.”
“Just you wait. You will be in a similar place soon enough.”
Richard ducked inside and shut the door. “Speaking of that.” He scratched his neck and winced before opening his mouth then closing it.
“Well, come on. Spit it out man.”
With a growl, Richard sat and propped his elbows on his knees. “Neither of us are without experience.”
Laughing, Darcy shook his head. “You more than me, Cousin. I rarely partook, and once I knew I loved Elizabeth, I refused to be a part of something so meaningless.” He never even tried. How would he have even managed to begin so much as complete the act? He would have been humiliated.
“I never imagined I would marry, Darce,” said Richard throwing himself back and crossing his ankle over his knee. “The problem I have is that she is a maiden.”
Darcy sat upon the edge of his desk and frowned at his cousin. “Are you saying you would have preferred her come to you already experienced?”
“No!” Richard waved his hands in front of him before covering his face. He let his arms drop. “I am saying this poorly.” After a minute or so pause, he looked back to Darcy. “I am terrified of hurting her. I have heard stories at the club of men and their wedding nights, but most could care less whether their wives want them in their bed. You are the one person I trust to ask advice on the matter.”
Darcy crossed his arms over his chest and made a study of his feet. “I suppose I should be flattered that of all people you would ask me, but since the subject is such an intimate one . . .” He exhaled and ran a hand through his hair, his arm falling back to its former position. “I wish I could tell you some secret to help you, but I was unsuccessful in that regard. Unfortunately, I do not know if it was something I did naught to prevent, something I did, or whether she would have hurt regardless.”
After a knock, Butler showed Gardiner inside. They greeted each other before Gardiner sat in a chair near Richard. “So, what are we discussing? Or did I interrupt?”
“No, not at all.” Darcy waved dismissively. “Richard was asking the secret to a successful wedding night.” His cousin stepped over to the fire, picked up the poker, and jabbed at the coals. His complexion somewhat red, though whether from the light of the flames or his embarrassment, he could not say.
“Should I worry about my niece?” asked Gardiner with a laugh. He held up a hand. “Forgive me, I am teasing you, but I do remember having the same concern when I wed my wife. The only advice I can give you is patience and control.”
Richard’s expression remained tight as he nodded, yet he said little afterwards as the conversation turned to business matters. A maid delivered coffee, which they drank until Witney arrived and the voices of the ladies carried through the open doorway, luring them to the drawing room.
~ * ~
“Oh, Jane,” said Aunt Gardiner. She held a handkerchief near her mouth as she gave a teary smile. “You are so lovely.”
Elizabeth stood back and allowed her aunt the opportunity to act the part of mother for the day. She and Jane had spoken of whether to send a carriage for her mother, but after the manner in which Mrs. Bennet behaved during their visit, Jane decided she preferred not to remain mortified for the entirety of her wedding day.
Jane smoothed a hand down the white embroidered silk gauze and tilted her head. “Do you think it will do?” She pivoted and studied the elegant train behind her.
“Do?” Lady Fitzwilliam stepped beside Jane and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Madame Villers is known for her masterpieces, and this gown is no different. You look every bit a viscountess. And, I much prefer that wig to Lady Anne’s, which was terribly out of fashion. I do know it is all you had at the time, but this is much more becoming.” She clasped her hands together in a dramatic fashion. “Now, I have a gift from my son.” She stepped over to the dressing table and picked up a wooden box she had brought with her.
Jane opened the lid with care as it protested by creaking at the movement. When her sister gasped, Elizabeth came to stand beside her. Nestled in velvet was a sapphire, pearl, and diamond necklace with matching ear bobs and comb. “Oh, Jane,” she said quietly.
With two hits of her walking stick against the floor, Lady Catherine craned her head to see from her chair. “What did he give her? I must have my share in what is happening?”
Lady Fitzwilliam took the box and tilted it. “They are the Carlisle sapphires. The housekeeper found them in the mistress’s dressing room when she cleaned it for Miss Bennet’s use.”
At a glance from Lady Fitzwilliam, their aunt took the necklace and draped it around Jane’s neck.
“My son said Lizzy had not yet found you a maid, but I have a young lady who has been training under my maid for some time. I have sent her to Carlisle House for the next fortnight. If you like her, you may hire her to remain with you.”
“Thank you, My Lady,” said Jane while her aunt placed the comb.
Lady Fitzwilliam rolled her eyes and handed Jane and ear bob. “None of that, my dear. You can address me as Evelyn or Mother, whichever you prefer. Your sister has yet to address me by my name since I invited her, but I assure you I am in earnest in the matter.”
When Mary stepped to her side, Elizabeth wrapped an arm around her. “You are next. Is aught prepared?”
“Yes, Aunt has been wonderful,” said Mary with teary eyes. “After Papa’s death, did you ever believe we would be where we are today?”
“No, I did not.” Elizabeth hugged her younger sister a bit closer. “We seem to have truly reversed our fortunes.”
“Not seemed, niece.” Their aunt tilted her head down as she spoke. “You have indeed.”
At a light knock, Elizabeth turned to the servants’ door. “Come!”
“I beg your pardon, but the bishop has arrived as has Lady Witney.”
Lady Fitzwilliam patted Jane’s hands and helped Lady Catherine as they made their way to the drawing room. After one last embrace, Aunt Gardiner and Mary followed Fitzwilliam’s relations, leaving Elizabeth and Jane to each other.
“I never imagined that when I rushed to beg Fitzwilliam’s help that it would lead us here.” She took Elizabeth’s arms and shook her head. “I am so happy. I never dreamt I could be thus.”
Elizabeth cradled her sister’s face and sniffed in attempt to hold back tears. “No one deserves felicity more than you, Dearest.” After a peck to Jane’s cheek, she inhaled and grinned. “Let us get you married. I am certain a very eager groom awaits you.”
As she made to turn, Jane grabbed her arm. “Lizzy, wait!”
“What is it?” Her sister bit her lip. “Aunt spoke to me of what to expect tonight. I want to know what advice you would give.”
Elizabeth’s cheeks heated, and she pressed her palms to them for a few seconds, hoping to cool them a bit. “I shall only say to trust Richard and to speak to him. He will learn as much from you as you will from him.”
“I do not understand,” said Jane with her nose crinkled.
“You will. I promise.” She took Jane’s hand and gave a gentle tug towards the door. “Are you ready.”
Her sister smiled and nodded. “Yes, I am.”
When they arrived at the bottom of the stairs, Uncle Gardiner awaited to give her to Richard, who still paced when Elizabeth entered the room. The moment his eyes landed upon the bride standing in the doorway, a calm overtook him and a wide grin replaced the tight lines of before.
Fitzwilliam took Elizabeth’s hand, and she rested her temple against his shoulder while they watched the besotted couple recite their vows. After they signed the register, Jane covered her mouth and laughed, but Richard pulled her hands away and drew her to his side. Jane Bennet was no more. She had been replaced by Jane Fitzwilliam, Lady Carlisle.
~ * ~
As Lady Fitzwilliam accepted her glass of sherry and relaxed back into her chair with a grace befitting that of royalty, her eyes darted to Jane who spoke to Aunt Gardiner near the fire. “She is a lovely girl,” she said to Richard. “I am pleased you discovered a lady you found tolerable. I began to fear you would never marry, and I would like to enjoy a grandchild or two in my dotage.”
“We have not even been wed a day, Mother, and you are pestering for grandchildren?” He took a gulp of his brandy, bearing his teeth as he swallowed, and touched his shoulder to Darcy’s. “Good Lord, Darce. Me? A father?” He had spoken in low tones, but Witney, who happened to be passing behind them, laughed and slapped him on the back.
“One thing at a time. If you consider all at once, you may faint.”
Darcy pressed his lips together to keep from chuckling but could not prevent his shoulders from shaking. He peeked at his cousin who glared at him. “Forgive me, but I do not believe I have ever heard you so overwrought.” He pointed to the glass. “Do not indulge too much in spirits as you do not want to be in your cups later.”
After his cousin peered into his drink, he downed the last and set the tumbler on the tray. “Good point.” His eyes set on Jane and softened though his foot tapped in an incessant rhythm on the carpet. “How long before we can depart for home?”
“If you are so inclined, say your goodbyes. I shall have the carriage brought around.”
Richard shook his head. “I do not believe I have ever used a carriage between our two houses unless I intended a brief stop during a trip to the club or my solicitors.” The work for the servants for such a short trip—”
“Jane’s trunks were packed and sent to your house this morning, so she has no boots to walk—only the slippers on her feet. The length of her gown would also be a problem for her. You will want the carriage.”
“You are correct, of course. I have never needed to pay heed such considerations. Thank you.”
While Richard collected his wife, Darcy poked his head into the hall and gave instructions to Butler. His cousin and Jane dispatched their farewells with an efficiency born of Richard’s military training and departed the moment the carriage was at the kerb.
The rest of their party, including Lady Catherine, made for their own homes not long after, leaving Darcy blessedly alone with Elizabeth. He knew once Jane wed Richard she would no longer live with them, but the reality of that arrangement and the benefits struck him as he brought her into the study and closed the door behind him.
She sat in the corner of the sofa, angled herself towards his desk, and pulled her legs underneath her, reclining into the corner. His breathing all but stopped and his heart pounded against his sternum at the familiar position. How many times had his desperate mind conjured her thus? Her eyes held the same glint, and she arched that one eyebrow in a sultry invitation.
Like a moth to a candle, he could not resist her lure. He sat upon the edge of the sofa and took her in his arms, his face burying into her neck. He tasted the sweetness of her flesh and inhaled deeply of her rosewater scent. He would be forever lost when it came to Elizabeth—to his wife.
He had been so alone for so long. He had family, had Georgiana and Richard, but Georgiana and Richard would have always had their own lives. He would have haunted the halls of this house and Pemberley for the rest of his life if it had not been for Elizabeth. Her return saved him.
“I love you,” he breathed into her ear. “I do not know how I would have survived without you.”
Her soft lips brushed his temple as she drew him up so they were face to face. “You need not ever think of that again because you do have me, and will forever.”
He slipped behind her, and she lay back against his chest, drawing his arms to her stomach. He held her with the side of his head pressed to hers. Holding her thus brought such comfort to him when he returned to that dark place he once inhabited.
She lifted one of his hands and kissed his thumb then his palm, and he responded by suckling that place just under her ear. A soft moan from her vibrated through him and his hand slid up from her stomach to squeeze her breast.
“Oh, Fitzwilliam,” she said quickly with a hiss. “That hurts.”
He jumped back as much as he could with the arm of the sofa behind him and frowned. “You have never complained of such before.”
She turned in his arms and began to touch his cravat. “They have been tender of late.” Her eyes met his and held them fast. “I am not certain, but I was to have my courses three weeks ago. My aunt believes I am with child.”
His eyes bulged and his jaw dropped.
“I shall not know until the babe quickens, and that will be several months from now.” She studied him while his heart raced for an entirely new reason. He could be a father before their first anniversary. He suddenly became dizzy. “Will you not say something?”
“I should not have teased Richard earlier?”
Elizabeth’s chin hitched back. “I do not understand.”
He shook his head and rested his palm on her stomach. “I cannot believe this has happened so soon.”
“Are you upset?”
His gaze returned to her wide eyes. “No, of course not. I am merely in shock. Little more than two months ago, Georgiana had just wed and I faced the prospect of being alone for the rest of my life. Forgive me if I am overwhelmed. I promise I am far from upset.”
“I do understand.” She rested her head against the back of the furniture and smiled. “Mary and I spoke today of how, since Papa’s death, we reversed our fortunes. Three months ago, I no more expected to be here with you, than you expected to be here with me. I do sometimes wonder how long before I become accustomed to so much change.”
“Well,” he said with a smile. “We have months before our lives will change again, but as long as we have good fortune, I shall welcome it with grace—I hope. With you, I have all I ever dreamt of. Any children that join us will be a blessing. When Jane returned you to me, my fortunes reversed as well. Now, my cup runneth over.”
Elizabeth threw her arms around his neck and held him close. “Oh, Fitzwilliam, I do love you so.” He could not remember a time when his heart was so full or he felt so alive, but in that moment, he considered himself the most fortunate man alive.
I hope you enjoyed this! I’d love to hear what you think!
If you haven’t read Agony and Hope yet, then take a stop by Amazon and pick it up 🙂
I have another Agony and Hope scene for you! Yay! I believe I mentioned on social media that I had rewritten the end of the story because it was too long between the engagement to the wedding then the end. When I did so, we lost a bit on the back end. I tried to move a bit around, so a few lines may be familiar from the argument later in the book between Darcy and the earl. In the earlier version, Darcy and Elizabeth were wed at Pemberley before returning to London to tell the Gardiners of their good health. My daughter revolted and insisted that wouldn’t work. I agreed with her so that bit was rewritten during edits. Other than knowing of a secondary pairing, I’m not sure there’s a spoiler involved. I’ve told everyone there’s an HEA and you know Elizabeth is alive, so I’m not offering a spoiler warning 🙂
In the original draft, this scene occurs after their return to London. Darcy and Elizabeth are wed and Richard and Jane are courting. I have not altered anything to fit the final edit of the book. I have left it as is, so this is completely unedited. Sorry for any errors!
Happy Reading!
Darcy descended the last step then tugged at the bottom of his topcoat as he glanced about the hall. He had not attended the theatre since Georgiana begged him to take her last Season, but when he mentioned the Theatre Royal at Drury Lane was putting on a production of the Taming of the Shrew, the light in Elizabeth’s eyes convinced him to put aside his desire to keep her to himself and whisk her away to the theatre.
In the month since they returned, they dined with Jane and Richard most evenings, but for the most part, they spent a prodigious amount of time together. Elizabeth and Jane had met with Madame Villers to be fitted for what little spring weather remained as well as for the summer months. They both also purchased fabrics for winter gowns and embroidery supplies to pass the time. Elizabeth selected materials for her rooms at Pemberley as well as Darcy House, though Mrs. Northcott would not begin redecorating until they departed for Pemberley in a fortnight, after they attended Miss Mary’s wedding.
As he made to enter the library to wait upon the ladies, a knock at the door made him pause. Butler was swift to admit Richard, who shook his great coat and removed it, allowing Butler to hurry away with the damp garment. “The fog is thick and has made the chill of the evening a penetrating one. I daresay a certain amount of the cold will remain into May. The weather simply has not warmed as I had hoped it would by now.
“Yes, I was surprised by the chill in the air when I visited my solicitors yesterday.”
Richard chuckled as he followed Darcy into the library. “Perhaps you and your wife should venture from the house more. Her maid accompanies Jane and me on our walks in the park since the two of you remain sequestered more often than not.
“Elizabeth spends time with her sister every day.”
His cousin held up his hands, palms forward. “Do not become offended, Darce. I am merely teasing. Jane has spoken of their time together as well as how she has urged her sister not to feel obliged to her.”
Darcy’s shoulders relaxed, and he lifted his eyebrows. “Jane? Do you have a request to make, Cousin?”
With a smile, Richard’s crooked grin was enough to answer Darcy’s question. “Jane is of age, but I journeyed to Gracechurch street this morning and spoke to Gardiner.”
“Did you?” Darcy sat in a chair and crossed his ankle over his knee. “What did he say?” He was genuinely curious. Mrs. Gardiner regularly visited both Jane and Elizabeth and shopped with them for fabrics, but Gardiner seemed content with Jane remaining Darcy’s responsibility. Not that Darcy minded. They simply had not discussed the matter.
“He indicated you should be applied to for the honour, though he did give his blessing.” Richard sat across from him and mirrored his position with the exception of his foot bobbing in a constant motion—his only outward sign of his agitation. Darcy could not help but smile at the sight of a former colonel in the Regulars nervous at the prospect of applying for a lady’s hand. His cousin had never been one to show his unease, even when he left for the peninsula to fight Napoleon’s army, but to be felled by a simple question was too amusing to overlook.
A low, easy laugh escaped before Darcy could stop it. “Do you love her?”
His cousin let out a growl and shifted as if he still wore a sabre at his hip. “I should have known you would be an arse about this.”
“I hope you do not speak so before your betrothed.” Darcy’s shoulders shook while he held in his amusement. He so seldom had this sort of opportunity. “You did not answer my question.”
Richard picked an imaginary piece of lint from his trousers, refusing to meet Darcy’s eye. “What question?”
“Do you love her?”
“Yes,” said Richard forcefully. “Are you pleased?”
“Yes, thank you, though you surrendered much sooner than I would have thought.”
“With Jane or with this conversation?”
“Both.” He cleared his throat in an attempt to stop laughing. “Have you told her you are in love with her?”
“Yes, not that it is any of your business.” He tugged at his cuffs.
Darcy pressed his lips together and reined in his amusement. “Forgive me for finding humour at your expense.” He blinked a couple of times. How best to say this? “You are a good man, a good cousin, an esteemed friend. You are more loyal than most I know and will put yourself in harm’s way to ensure those you care for are unharmed. You are not reticent, by any means, but you do not share your feelings with ease. When I asked if you told Jane, I wanted to know if you could speak to her of matters close to your heart. I am glad to know you trust her enough to share your concerns. You have my blessing and consent.”
Richard shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. “Thank you.” He picked at one of his fingernails before meeting Darcy’s eye. “And, yes, I can speak to her. I told her of Carlisle.”
“What did she say?”
“She understood why I was uncomfortable with the title and my position, yet she convinced me to be more accepting of it all since Carlisle will never return.”
If Jane had been successful at his cousin finally accepting what his aunts and Darcy had been saying since the announcement of Carlisle’s supposed death, then she would be good for him. “Did she tell you about Bingley?”
Richard rolled his eyes and scoffed. “Bingley never deserved her, yet I disagree with your actions at the time. If I had known her when you told me of separating Bingley from an unsuitable lady, I would have hit you without holding back for hurting her. You were wrong, even though I believe you did her a tremendous favour.”
“I did tell Bingley of my interference at Pemberley. He claimed he would return to Hertfordshire for her, but never did. I am certain Miss Bingley heard of the family’s predicament, which was why she insisted upon him giving up the lease to Netherfield.” Bingley had been weak willed. He did not deserve someone as good and kind as Jane Bennet.
Musical laughter sliced through the heaviness of the conversation and beckoned to him. At her appearance in the doorway, he stood and welcomed Elizabeth with an outstretched hand to draw her close. A lingering kiss was bestowed to her knuckles as he drank in her beauty. Her eyes sparkled and her complexion glowed. The gauzy crimson fabric of her gown brought a bit of colour to her cheeks, and his mother’s rubies stood in stark contrast to the fairness of her neck.
When he forced his attention from his wife, he turned in time to witness the slight tilt of Jane’s head and her soft smile. The expression was similar to one she had worn for Bingley, yet her eyes held a depth that was not present years ago when she had looked upon his friend. Richard’s gentle gaze held his betrothed’s eyes while he brushed a light kiss to the back of her hand. Tenderness was not a word he would have ever associated with his cousin, yet watching him with Jane, he witnessed a side of his cousin he had never known.
In that moment, his regrets about his part in Jane’s separation from Bingley disappeared entirely—that niggling in his gut that would not let him forget what he had cost her. Jane had found a love more fulfilling than what she could have ever had with the man who was once his close friend.
“Fitzwilliam?”
He turned to Elizabeth’s eyebrows drawn down a bit in the middle. “Forgive me. I am happy for them. She seems much happier with Richard than she was with Bingley.”
“She is,” said Elizabeth. “She has told me as much. The circumstances of the past few years have changed her, and she has wondered if Mr. Bingley would have resented her for Lydia’s downfall. Richard knows of everything—of Lydia and St. Giles—and still wants her. I do not know what they have spoken of, but she has indicated he has confided a great deal to her. She is honoured by his trust.” She studied his face for a moment. “You did give your consent, did you not?”
“Of course, I did. Richard is a good man and like a brother to me. I could not deny him love, particularly when I believe Jane is precisely what he needs.” He brushed his lips against her hand one more time before Butler interrupted to inform them the carriage had been brought around.
After donning their coats and hats, the gentlemen handed in their ladies before joining them, though sitting together since propriety dictated Jane and Elizabeth share a seat. The trip to the Theatre Royal was not a long one, so they soon alighted in front and helped the ladies dodge the remnants of the horses to enter the building.
Darcy removed his great coat, handing it to his waiting footman, before helping Elizabeth with her cape. Once his servant was in possession of their belongings, he hurried up to the boxes to await their party.
Under the light of the candles, Elizabeth glowed as those fine eyes that enchanted him looked up and down at the grandeur of the new theatre that had replaced the former, which burned in 1809. His eyes traced over her now full head of auburn curls, which allowed Taylor to use jewelled pins, combs, and ribbons to give her a more stylish coiffure. Tonight, Taylor used a crimson ribbon to match the hue of Elizabeth’s gown.
“Shall we make our way to the boxes?” asked Richard with Jane on his arm.
Darcy looked around at a sea of people, some of whom were noting his entrance and examining Elizabeth in great detail as she had her hand upon his arm. “I believe so.”
One or two acquaintances stopped them along the way. Darcy politely introduced Elizabeth, and since most knew Richard, he introduced Jane as his cousin’s betrothed, raising more than a few eyebrows in the process. They had barely reached the staircase when a hand grasped Darcy’s arm and whipped him around.
“Have you so little respect, boy?”
He ensured Elizabeth was well, then stiffened, drawing himself as tall as he could. “I beg your pardon, Lord Fitzwilliam. Is there a problem?”
“A problem?” His uncle hissed spraying spittle in the process. “I bring you suitable candidates to be your wife, and you choose this chit?” Lord Fitzwilliam’s eyes raked over Elizabeth as though she were covered in filth. “Have you forgotten what you owe your family? What you owe me?” People around them halted their conversations to watch the spectacle with eager eyes, and no doubt, storing away what was said to gossip about during their calls on the morrow.
“I told you years ago I would not agree to your marriage schemes. I wed my wife with nothing but my own happiness and that of hers in mind. I owe you nothing.” He needed to rid himself of his uncle, even though the earl was only making himself appear the fool.
“What of—?”
“No more,” said Darcy with a firmness that made his uncle clamp his mouth shut. “I have told no one of the breach between our houses, but your display of ill-temper tonight should have tongues wagging for weeks. Do you wish all and sundry to know why I have broken with you?”
His uncle peered over one shoulder then the other. “This is not over, Darcy.”
Darcy chuckled and leaned closer to the earl. “This is indeed over. You tend to your house, and I shall tend to mine. While you are doing so, you might spend less time at the club playing cards. I believe you have enough of Carlisle’s and his wife’s gambling debts to pay.”
Lord Fitzwilliam turned a brilliant shade of red that nearly matched the colour of Elizabeth’s gown before Darcy turned his back and started to lead his party up the stairs.
“You,” said the earl in a sneer.
Richard gave no indication of disquiet nor did he bow. “My Lord, I am here with my cousin and betrothed.” He rested a hand atop Jane’s on his arm. “Miss Bennet, this man is my father the Earl Fitzwilliam. He will never be admitted into our homes.”
“You will not marry that trollop!” All talk within the room silenced as the few who had not already been taking in the spectacle turned to watch. “I forbid it.”
Jane’s hand slid into Richard’s as he stepped down so he was face to face with his father. “Forbid my marriage all you wish. You will not stop me, and I shall never wed someone of your choosing. In that, Darcy and I are of precisely the same mind. You have attempted to twist and bend the will of your family until we act as you desire. By joining the Regulars, I removed myself from your machinations long ago, and while I am now your heir, I refuse to be controlled by you.”
Richard turned his back on his father and drew Jane beside him as they ascended the stairs. The crowd began to murmur, surely shocked at what had just occurred. They may have attended for “The Taming of the Shrew,” but they had an earlier offering that would be spoken of in the drawing rooms around London for weeks if not months, particularly in light of the common knowledge of Lady Fitzwilliam’s solitary living arrangement.
They were quiet until they reached the box, but the moment the curtain fell behind them, Richard dragged Jane back into the dim recesses and took her in his arms. When Darcy glanced about the theatre, a few people sat in their boxes or in their seats below, but the vast majority were still in the entrance hall. He looked back to see Richard’s head on Jane’s shoulder while she whispered into his ear.
He steered Elizabeth so they stood in front of his cousin and her sister, blocking them from the general view of the theatre. “I apologise for my uncle’s spectacle.” His uncle had never been one to enjoy the theatre, and he had never expected his uncle to confront them in such a public manner. The earl’s concern over appearances typically overrode his affront, so tonight’s exhibition was not something he ever imagined would take place in the theatre or anywhere else.
“You have nothing to apologise for,” said Elizabeth in hushed tones. “Will Richard be well?”
“I am certain he will. He abhors what his father is and avoids him as does Lady Fitzwilliam.” At her crinkled forehead, he moved so his mouth was near her ear. “It is common knowledge among the Ton that my uncle lives with his mistress. My aunt insisted he go years ago, and he has never returned—not that she is amenable.”
Elizabeth blinked rapidly for a few seconds and shook her head. “What a shame. He will one day have no one but himself for comfort.”
“He has no one to blame but himself,” said Richard as he and Jane joined them. “Forgive me. I fear my father and I shall never see eye to eye. Darcy’s father took me in when I left home and Pemberley was where I returned from Cambridge as well as where I returned when I had leave from the military. Darcy, Georgiana, and my mother are my family. Before Jane, I was unsure if I would ever trust someone enough to have a marriage like my Uncle and Aunt Darcy or even you and Darcy. When he threatened that, I—”
Elizabeth squeezed his cousin’s hand and shook her head. “You need not explain yourself to me. Jane seems to know all and that is what is most important. We shall make the announcement of your betrothal in the paper, and the two of you will wed by special license like Fitzwilliam and I did.” She tipped her head down to ensure Richard met her eye. “Do not let him ruin our evening.”
“Thank you, Lizzy,” said Jane, who hugged Richard’s arm to her.
Darcy drew his wife back to his side and kissed her temple. He cared not if all of the Ton called him besotted. He was, after all. “I do not believe my uncle will carry through on his threats, but we should send the betrothal announcement tomorrow. We will also obtain the license. Georgiana and Witney return to town in two days.”
Elizabeth smiled. “I can plan a simple wedding breakfast in two days.”
He nodded. “Good, I say the sooner we have them wed, the better.”
Happy Monday! I promised once Agony and Hope had been released for a bit, I’d post an outtake for you! I have always said it is a HEA story, but just in case SPOILER WARNING, if you haven’t read it. Just to set up the scene–this takes place during the trip back to London to reveal all to the Gardiners and the other HEA bits. This is from the first draft, so it has not gone through editing and a bit rough. The story was also a bit different at the time so I’ve had to adapt it to fit the newer timeline. I hope you enjoy!
A Call to Mrs. Bennet
Elizabeth’s temple rested against the squabs while the scenery passed through the carriage window. They had not tarried at Drayton for long after the betrothal. The following day, Fitzwilliam had sent out letters arranging their travel and requesting the Gardiner’s company at Darcy House for dinner within the next se’nnight after their return. They had departed as soon as the horses had their rest and were, at last, on their final day of travel. As much as Elizabeth had wished to either remain at Drayton or start their lives at Pemberley, she had no choice but to go to town, though she had not relished the prospect of their return journey. She was weary of travel.
Her stomach rolled at the idea of revealing herself to her aunt and uncle, and she pressed a hand to her belly to quell the unrest. The disquiet within, however, was not caused by the nervousness of telling them, but rather, their possible reaction to the shocking news. They would be upset, to be sure, but would they forgive her? She and Jane had worried them and cost them some much needed funds investigating their disappearance. Her uncle’s children were more entitled to that money than the Bennet daughters, which was why Elizabeth and Jane had hidden themselves away in the first place. The Gardiners should not have been forced to bear the cost of their impoverished family. Elizabeth loved her father dearly, but his failings as head of the family had not gone unnoticed.
Elizabeth faced forward where her betrothed of four days sat across from her, reading Milton. The night before they departed, he had mentioned how she proved a most effective distraction from his reading, and how, when in her company, he had attempted to read passages more than once without a pittance of success. At the moment, he appeared engrossed in the prose upon the page instead of her. Was she still a distraction or had their engagement been the antidote to his affliction?
She bit her lip and smiled as she slid her foot forward to tap Fitzwilliam’s boot. At the contact, he glanced to Jane and Richard who both slept against the side of the carriage, closed his book, and lifted his eyebrows. The stiff edge of his boot grazed her ankle. “What are you about, Miss Elizabeth?” He spoke in soft tones.
“How do you get on reading today, sir?”
One side of his lips quirked and he shook his head. “Not at all. I must discover how to free myself of this interference. Do you have any ideas for my relief?”
“I can think of several, sir.” How she would adore kissing him again! The mere thought was enough to give her gooseflesh.
“Can you?” He crossed his arms over his chest. “And what do you suggest?”
“Perhaps using second carriage for your cousin and future sister,” said Richard dryly. He had not opened his eyes or moved his head. “Then, we would not be forced to endure listening your flirtatious drivel.” Elizabeth started, pulled back her walking boot, and directed her attention back to the passing scenery. How mortifying! She would not have engaged Fitzwilliam in such a way if she had known Richard could hear.
“You could have mentioned you were awake instead of eavesdropping,” said Fitzwilliam.
Richard straightened and rolled his eyes. “You know I cannot read in a moving carriage, which leaves me little to do for pleasure. I sometimes prefer to keep my eyes closed and rest when I cannot find sleep. I have made this journey often and no longer obtain enjoyment from watching the woods and farmland pass by the window.”
As they passed an inn, Elizabeth frowned and followed the building until it disappeared from her line of sight. “Fitzwilliam? Are we in Hatfield?”
He peered through the window and shrugged. “I am not sure, but we should be in Hertfordshire.”
“I know where we are. I rode with Papa once to fetch a book he wanted from a bookseller in Hatfield. This is not the road one usually travels to journey to London.” She narrowed her eyes. “Are we going to Longbourn?”
He sighed and his shoulders dropped a bit. “No, but I did plan our final stop for Meryton. I meant to surprise you. The horses could rest, and you and Jane could see your mother and sister before we continue our journey.”
“Mama?” Jane sat up. “We are to visit Mama?”
“Yes, unless you would rather not.” His eyes darted back and forth between them. “We can bypass Meryton and stop at the next village.”
Elizabeth reached forward and took his hand. “This was incredibly thoughtful of you. Thank you. We should tell Mama in person. I am ashamed for not considering her.” He squeezed her hand in return.
“I thought of Mama.” They all looked at Jane who sighed. “I do care for my mother’s feelings, yet I feel guiltier about deceiving Uncle Gardiner than Mama. We were his responsibility, and he was left to tell Mama of our disappearance, pay for the investigators, then inform her of our death. He and our aunt have always loved us like their own children and were likely beside themselves with worry and grief. I do not mean to belittle my mother’s feelings, but my concern lay more with speaking to our aunt and uncle than Mama. I thought after speaking to them, I would request we travel to Meryton if no one else made mention of it.”
Elizabeth took a deep breath as she sat back in the seat. Their first day of reckoning would come sooner than she had initially planned, but her mother would not be as difficult. Mama would moan and complain of her nerves, but would, no doubt, forgive them—particularly when Elizabeth introduced Fitzwilliam as her betrothed. She only hoped Francis Bennet would not faint dead away upon hearing the happy news. She chewed on her lip. What if her mother began raving about Fitzwilliam’s wealth? She stiffened at the thought.
Something tapped her walking boot, making her jump. “Stop fretting,” said Fitzwilliam. “I remember your mother well.”
Jane nudged Elizabeth’s shoulder. “Perhaps we should purchase salts prior to our call.” After laughing at Jane’s comment, the carriage became eerily quiet as though they were to attend a funeral rather than resurrecting a loved one from the ashes.
The miles dragged by until they alighted in front of the Cross Keys inn. Fitzwilliam offered Elizabeth his arm, and they walked in the direction of Longbourn, though they stopped well before at a small but well-tended cottage at the edge of the village.
Her eyes roved over the façade, which boasted a newly thatched roof evident by the fresh straw colour of the reeds and sedge. “How do you know where they live?
“Your uncle told me of it the evening I learnt of your death.” She gripped Fitzwilliam’s elbow and shook her free arm in an attempt to dispel some of her nerves.
Richard unlatched the gate and held it open. “So, shall we go in or shall we stand here for the next hour or two and speak of the weather?” When they approached the door, Jane knocked then grasped Elizabeth’s free hand.
The door opened a crack and a familiar face peeked through before it swung the remainder of the way. “Miss Bennet! Miss Elizabeth! Oh! Bless my soul!”
“Hello, Mrs. Hill,” said Elizabeth. “I was not aware you stayed with Mama. Are you and Mr. Hill well?”
The housekeeper hurried them inside. “Yes, Mr. Hill and I are very well, thank you. I am relieved to see you young ladies hale and standing before me.” Her eyes flickered to Fitzwilliam and Richard before the latter requested they be introduced.
Jane moved to stand beside Mrs. Hill. “Mr. Darcy, you may remember Mrs. Hill? She was our housekeeper at Longbourn.” She held her hand in the direction of Fitzwilliam. “Mr. Darcy and my sister were lately engaged.”
The woman’s eyes widened to the size of horse chestnuts. “Thank the Lord I bought more salts this week.” She bent closer to Elizabeth. “You had best ensure your mother is sitting when you tell her the news. That way, you need not catch her when she faints.”
“Mrs. Hill,” said Jane who gestured towards Richard. “This gentleman is Viscount Carlisle, Mr. Darcy’s cousin.”
“My Lord,” said Mrs. Hill with a bobbed curtsey. “Let me show you to the parlour. I shall not introduce you since I am certain you will want to tell your mother yourself.” She opened the first door in the entry and held out an arm, gesturing for them to enter. Elizabeth and Jane shared a glance before her sister stepped inside with Elizabeth bracing herself before following.
“Hill, when will you bring tea? We always have tea at one.” Her mother never looked up from her needlework until she let her hand holding the frame drop into her lap. “Hill—” As soon as her eyes set upon her two eldest, she gasped then gaped for at least a minute before she swayed in her seat.
“Mama!” They rushed to their mother’s side and knelt at her feet. “’Tis truly us,” said Elizabeth. “We hid from Uncle Gardiner so he would not need to support us.”
When she still did not speak, Jane took the embroidery from her and clutched her hands. “Mama, will you not say something?”
“Your uncle said you were dead. When I first saw you, I thought you had come to take me.”
Elizabeth’s hands joined Jane’s. “No, we are not dead. Unfortunately, we did lead Uncle to believe us to be. We are terribly sorry for causing you pain, but Uncle could not afford to support us all, regardless of how he wished he could.” Elizabeth waved Fitzwilliam and his cousin inside the room. “Mama, do you remember Mr. Darcy?” No matter what she and Jane said, with the exception of the one sentence, her mother sat in stunned silence. Her sister shrugged at the uncharacteristic behaviour. Was this to be the extent of their visit? Surely there had to be some way of snapping her from this stupor.
She stood, wrapped her fingers around Fitzwilliam’s arm, and held out her hand to show off a ring Fitzwilliam had given her to mark their betrothal. “Mr. Darcy asked me to marry him. Is that not wonderful.”
At the mention of his name, Richard stepped beside Fitzwilliam and bowed. “Mrs. Bennet, ’tis a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”
Her mother blinked, looked to Fitzwilliam, then to Richard. She extended an arm and pointed at Elizabeth’s hand. Elizabeth held it out as her mother peered down at the ring. When she lifted her head, she still appeared dazed until without warning, she clasped her hands together. “Thank heavens! We are saved! Hill! Where is that tea?” She began waving a handkerchief that appeared out of nowhere. “Oh! What a good girl you are? And so clever!” Her mother stopped flapping the bit of muslin long enough to wink in an overdramatic fashion.
Elizabeth’s eyes bulged. What? Oh Lord! Her mother could not possibly be implying—
“I suppose he is marrying you because you are with child. Of course, every gentleman wants an heir.” Richard began coughing as though he were choking. “At the assembly, they said his income was ten-thousand pounds!” She enunciated Fitzwilliam’s income. In that moment, Elizabeth wished to shrink to the size of an ant, if such a thing were possible. “Ten-thousand pounds! And so handsome! Oh! I shall go distracted. Where are my salts? Hill! Hillllll!”
Elizabeth turned her head into Fitzwilliam’s arm and closed her eyes. Her mother thought she hid to become Fitzwilliam’s mistress. She would die of shame.
“Mrs. Bennet,” said Fitzwilliam, “I was as shocked as you when I discovered your daughters were alive. I loved your daughter when I stayed at Netherfield three years ago, but I never declared myself. I meant to when I happened upon Elizabeth visiting my estate with her aunt and uncle a year later, but they departed Derbyshire before I could propose. The Gardiners told me of her disappearance when all was for naught. When I found her last month, I decided I could not rest until she was my bride. I would never make her an improper offer. I beg you not to insult either of us by implying otherwise.”
How Elizabeth wanted to take his face in her hands and kiss him most improperly! Her mother’s mouth opened and closed before her jaw snapped shut.
Fitzwilliam’s body shifted slightly and a kiss was bestowed to her temple. “I love you,” he whispered near her ear. “We shall be gone for London soon.”
Elizabeth lifted her head to meet his eye. “Thank you.”
Mrs. Bennet began to fan her handkerchief once more. “Then I suppose you have come for Jane,” she said looking to the viscount. “Oh! I knew she could not be so beautiful for nothing. A viscount! Hillllll!”
Mrs. Hill bustled in with the tea service, set it on the table, then wafted a small jar of salts before Mrs. Bennet’s nose. Their mother flinched and began shaking that ridiculous scrap of cloth.
“Mama,” said Jane, “where is Kitty?”
“She went to visit my sister. She was supposed to return before tea.” She turned wide eyes on her callers. “You will stay for tea, will you not?” She began spooning the crushed leaves into the pot until with a swift movement, she looked at Jane then Elizabeth. “Why do you stand there so? And why are you still wearing bonnets? Sit!” She giggled as she continued her preparations. “Lady Lucas will be so jealous. I will have Mr. Darcy and very likely a viscount for sons when she has only Mr. Collins.”
Jane sat upon the small settee. “Has Maria never married?”
“She is betrothed to the youngest Goulding boy.” She gave a sniff. “He is a cleric.”
“A cleric is quite respectable,” said Elizabeth.
“He is no viscount nor is he worth ten-thousand a year.” Their mother pressed her palms together as if she were praying. “Lady Carlisle.” The words were said in almost a reverent whisper. “How well that sounds!”
“La! The two of you have been alive all this time? What a joke!” The entire room pivoted to Kitty who stood in the doorway. “And Mr. Darcy? What is he doing here?”
Mrs. Bennet nodded her head in Elizabeth’s direction. “He and Lizzy are to be married, and Jane marry Lord Carlisle.” The last was said reverently and with dreamy eyes aimed at Richard, who stepped back and stood half-way between her mother and the door, as one might do when considering a swift escape.
“We are not even courting, Mama.”
“Oh!” She gave a dismissive flick of her wrist. “You are as good as married. I am certain of it.”
Kitty skipped to the window and plunked into the closest chair. “If Jane has returned, then I need not live with Uncle Gardiner as she can live with them and help with the children.” Elizabeth had hoped Kitty had matured without Lydia’s influence, but her hopes seemed to have been in vain.
Mama exhaled dramatically. “No, you will go. Your uncle can afford you much better than me, and with your sister’s betrothals, you will be thrown into the paths of rich men. ’Tis a shame you aren’t as agreeable as Lydia or beautiful as Jane, but look at Mary. If she can capture a man of reasonable wealth, so can you.”
Elizabeth gripped Fitzwilliam’s arm, her fingernails digging into the wool of his topcoat. “We should be returning to the inn. The horses will have been changed by now.”
“I am sure they have.” Fitzwilliam took her mother’s hand and bowed. “Pray, forgive the brevity of our call, but we did want to inform you of the good health of your daughters in person.”
“Mama, we are to dine with our aunt and uncle this week. We plan to tell them then,” said Jane as Richard helped her stand. “We would appreciate you not write to Aunt of our visit for the time being.”
Their mother huffed and flattened her lips. “But I may tell the local families?”
Elizabeth suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. “Yes, you may.”Her mother allowed a smug smile and clasped her hands, her shoulders lifting with the motion. “Lady Carlisle! How well that sounds!” Was that Jane who had groaned?
Happy Thursday, everyone! It’s been a crazy week. We find out we’re moving… AGAIN! And, Agony and Hope is released! I’d like to thank everyone who helped get my book baby out: Carol, who edited it, Debbie and Brenna for proofreading, my ARC readers, and then everyone who has purchased and reviewed it. What a roller coaster!
This book started in my head years ago with the scene of Jane showing up at Darcy’s door. The scenario flitted back into my mind from time to time. I would let it play out but I never sat down to start writing it out until late last year. The injury to my back slowed my writing down a lot and created a lot of inconsistencies that I had to go back and fix once I’d written the entire thing. I’d changed names and all sorts of problems. The ending was also longer. I have a scene that was cut that I will rework and post later. The ending was changed in editing, so I’ll have to do a bit of tweaking to it so I don’t contradict the published story.
Anyway, I will see what I can spruce up from my original manuscript to give you a bit more over the next couple of weeks. I’m trying to flesh out a new story, so we’ll see when and what I can come up with.
In the meantime, thank you for all of your kind words on Agony and Hope, and if you haven’t read it yet, what are you waiting for? Go read!!
As we’re all probably aware, medicine in the Regency Period left little to be desired in terms of treatments and success rates. We’ve all heard of bleedings and treatments containing everything from arsenic to mercury, but what were some of the medical terms and treatments?
Apoplexy is a term we hear or read a lot in terms of Regency illnesses. When used in a historical context, apoplexy refers to a death preceded by a loss of consciousness, which can be a bit of a catch-all. A person may die of a stroke, massive heart attack, or simply a sudden death by another means and be lumped under apoplexy. Today, apoplexy is used more as a scientific term for bleeding.
Grippe is a term that was a term used for influenza and refers to the constriction of the throat felt by some sufferers. Influenza was thought to be caused by “bad air” and a medical writer of the time, William Buchan, cautioned of hot air. He claimed the hot air dissipated the watery parts of the blood and caused ‘bilious and inflammatory fevers’.
Unfortunately, for those with apoplexy, little could be done, but for those who suffered from other illnesses, where there any reasonable treatments? Apothecaries could dispense tinctures, but a few common remedies did exist. We’ve all heard of the opiate laudanum used for pain. Laudanum, of course, was very addictive, despite its efficacy.
In 1757, Reverend Edward Stone experimented with white willow bark. He dried it, ground it into a powder, and took it in an effort to determine whether it would reduce pain and fever. White willow bark contains Salicin, which is an active part of aspirin. In 1763, he wrote to the Royal Society to report his success with the experiment. For those who were reluctant to rely on laudanum for pain, willow bark offered a suitable alternative as well as a method of controlling fever.
If the patient could sit up and swallow, their caregivers could use an invalid’s cup or feeder cup to help keep them hydrated and nourished with teas and broths. An invalid’s cup resembled a small tea pot without a lid. Some were constructed like tea cups or some of the time period could be made of silver.
Decent medical treatments almost seem crazy when we consider many medical men of the Regency period favored what they called “heroic medicine,” which included aggressive bloodletting, vomiting, intestinal purging, sweating and blistering. Sounds pleasant, doesn’t it?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apoplexy
https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=grippe
Todd, Janet & Blank, Antje (editors). The Cambridge Edition of Persuasion. Cambridge University Press (2006)
Wilson, Kim. Tea with Jane Austen. Jones Books (2004)
